On one of our regular outings to the local wal-mart, just needing to grab a couple of things, expecting that we were going to go in and out without a second thought. Easy right! Go in, get what you need, and leave. All was going well, we found what we needed, did a bit of browsing, and headed to the checkout. We were almost out the door, another successful trip with no complications, just one person left and then our turn. As we got to the front the cashier held her stomach and moaned. I ask “are you okay?”, she returns with “I’m ok, my stomach just hurts, but I only have to work until ten.” Until ten, I think to myself, thats still 2 hours away. And then it started, you know that feeling you get when you know that you are supposed to do something, the butterflies that just wont go away unless you heed what it is you know the Lord is saying. So now here I am standing there, one item scanned and now a second, and a third, time is running out and the butterflies begin to intensify. Do I obey and pray for her or do I leave and pretend that it never happened? It’s not like I have much to offer, or do I? Is Jesus sufficient? Will He be with me, will he answer my prayer? All this is running through my mind in the few moments that we are standing there. And then, the last item was scanned, this is it, if I don’t do it now, I wont at all. A scream comes from within and I manage to utter the words, “I am a christian, and I believe that Jesus heals, can I pray for you”. To my delight and terror, because there in another person behind me waiting to be rung through, she says yes, so I hold out my hands, she also reaches out and I say a short prayer, “Jesus you are a God that heals, so Holy Spirit I pray that you would come and touch her tummy and that the pain would go away, in Jesus Name, Amen.” Immediately after I finish, through a little giggle she says, “wow I feel better already.” I smile and then turn to walk away. Inside I feel a mass of emotion, ranging from excitement because God had really touched her, to complete horror at what I had just done knowing that the people behind had watched the whole thing and that I was completely vulnerable. But I did it, I was obedient and I knew that God was pleased. And it shouldn’t matter what others think anyway.
Today in the prayer room I felt God speak to my heart, why are you doing this trip, is it to do my will, what I have purposed, or just for you to do your own thing. Ouch, that hit me hard, because up to this point, as I mentioned earlier, it has been all about me. I had to make a choice, was I going to heed His quiet leadings or was I going to continue on with my own agenda. A relatively easy choice, I have to admit, I would choose to be open to what He would want to use me for. So I declared to Him, “Lord I will be obedient!” I thought it was an easy choice, cause what would he ask me to do anyway. But would it really be that easy? It is one thing to say that you will, it is another thing when you are faced with a situation that requires you to come out of your comfort zone and actually step out. And besides how often would I have to “respond”. And then it happened again, that famous feeling, butterflies! Not more than an hour after returning home from the prayer room, after making that bold statement, we decided to take the kids to McDonalds play center (it has been a rainy day here, and too cold to play outside). There was a woman sitting not far off with her son, a sweet little boy about Ezekiel’s age, and God said, “she needs to be encouraged”. “What” I reply, “right now, but we are just hanging out with the kids, and I am not prepared, I haven’t planned to speak to anyone, are you sure?” And He simply says “yes, right now.” So now, knowing that God wants to use me, I take a moment to ask Him a few questions about her, where she is at in her life and what he wants to say? He leads me in what I am to say, but now what. Do I just walk up to her and tell her, do I strike up a conversation and then just slide it in with out actually coming right out and saying “God wants you to know.” And now I start to feel an urgency, for all I know she could leave at any moment. I better act fast, or at least try, all the while feeling just as nervous and anxious as the last time. So I go and begin to play with the kids, hoping that through some working of the Lord that he would work out a way for me to talk to her. Praise the Lord that He is always faithful. The time is right, so I go for it, I dive right in with, “Hi, I’m Shayne, I’m a Christian, and I believe that Jesus speaks today and I believe that he wants you to know that he sees you and all your hard work and that you are a good mom”, and so on. She smiles, lets out a little sigh, and says “thanks”, I could tell that those few words were just what she needed to hear. Praise the Lord that he knows so much better than I. Something so small can have a huge impact.
I am so humbled and blessed to be a servant and daughter of the most high. He knows so much better than I and I am excited to see what else he will ask me to do, even if it involves all the crazy emotions that always seem to come with it. Here’s to being obedient and heeding those gentle nudges. I only pray that I will bring honor to my God and King, whom I love dearly.
Thanks for Journeying with us,
The Schafers
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